The
Bible is a never ending storehouse of the Knowledge of God. As Paul told
Timothy:
2Ti
3:16 All scripture is given by
inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for
correction, for instruction in righteousness:
17 That the man of God may be perfect, throughly
furnished unto all good works.
There
is much that the Word has to say about raising children.
Pr 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will
not depart from it.
So
we see that the foundation of training a child, comes from the wisdom and
knowledge contained in the Word which is the instructions from the Creator.
Pr
4:20 ¶ My son, attend to my words;
incline thine ear unto my sayings.
21 Let them not depart from thine eyes; keep
them in the midst of thine heart.
22 For they are life unto those that find them,
and health to all their flesh.
Keeping
the Word before the child, in your actions and in your life will give them the
roots for a life that will be fruitful and prosperous, and healthy.
All
things being the best for a child, they should have a father and mother. In
today’s world there are many broken families. The same principles apply for the
raising of children, but it will be much more difficult for one parent.
Dr.
Dobson said that there are only three ways to teach a child; example, example,
and example.
Your
faith in God needs to be open and normal in your actions before your children.
They need to see your faith and devotion. You need to pray often with them and
in front of them.
Say Grace and be thankful for your food and ask the Lord's blessings on it. Also give thanks for the daily blessings that the Lord provides.
Eph
6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your
children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Sometimes
it is not an easy task to keep your temper and not loose it. Your child will
learn from you. God treats us all with compassion and forgiveness. He loves us
and gave His Son for us. We need to seek Him and follow His example with our
own children.
None
of us is perfect, and all make mistakes, but we need to show our children that
we are sorry and apologize; again, your example is shown. Your words are very powerful,
and a demeaning statement, or calling a child stupid, or not as good as a sibling
can have bad effects for a lifetime.
Ro
10:17 So then faith cometh by hearing,
and hearing by the word of God.
This
truth is that faith comes from what you continually hear…if it is God’s Word
then it forms the foundation of faith that we want. If it is the word of the
world, then it forms the foundation that is against God and is what we do not
want for our children. Careful what they watch and hear, but you do the same.
Commandment
5 is the only command of the first 10 that has a promise with it:
Ex
20:12 ¶ Honour thy father and thy
mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth
thee.
You
see when your child honors you, they are honoring God and following the hierarchy
that God set up. The secret to long life is to honor, love, respect, and care
for your parents. Simple, yet few live to be very old. A promise that is not
always practiced or understood for honor and respect are something that is
instilled by being honorable and respectful.
For
a young child learning to obey and respect you and God:
1Jn
3:1 ¶ Behold, what manner of love the
Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God:
therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not.
They
need to know that God made them and they are unique and special to Him, and you.
Jer
29:11 For I know the thoughts that I
think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give
you an expected end.
Corrective discipline for disobedience. This has been shunned, ignored, and taught against for a few generations. But, the word teaches us about it for a reason.
Pr
22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart
of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Pr
19:18 Chasten thy son while there is
hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
Pr
13:24 ¶ He that spareth his rod hateth
his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
Pr
20:11 Even a child is known by his
doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
Pr
29:17 ¶ Correct thy son, and he shall
give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.
These
were not written to abuse a child, but to establish boundaries, limits, and obedience.
If a child does not learn limits and obedience when young and home, then when
they are away from home and in the world, the workforce, and the law will show
them limits and consequence for disobedience, which will not go over well for
them.
They
need to understand that disobedience and rebellion carries consequence, the
quicker the better. Reasoning is not very effective with a young child, they do
not understand the concept and will agree to avoid further correction. However
they do understand a swat on the butt for disobedience. I used to have a small
paddle and when my child would willingly disobey, I have seen them bring me the
paddle. I am not talking about taking action in anger, or with an accidental breaking
or spill etc. You know when your child willingly disobeys. You are God’s
representative to your children.
Pv
1:7 ¶ The fear of the LORD is the beginning
of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.
8 My son, hear the instruction of thy father,
and forsake not the law of thy mother:
9 For they shall be an ornament of grace unto
thy head, and chains about thy neck.
Heb
12:6 For whom the Lord loveth he
chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.
7 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you
as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?
8 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof
all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.
9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh
which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in
subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
10 For they verily for a few days chastened us after
their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his
holiness.
Always
in love, understanding, and mercy. Never in destruction, sickness, or calamity.
People do not understand this. You will see religions talking about penance, or
paying for your sin. God sent Jesus to DIE for your sin, you just need to
believe in Jesus and what He has done…accept Him as your Saviour in all things.
God will not put sickness or injury on you for your sin, would you put
something like that on your child for disobeying? All sickness and disease
originates with our enemy, Satan. Jesus took your diseases on the cross, Isa
53, 1 Pet 2:23. God chastises you with His Word, just as you can chastise your
older children with a word easier than a swat.
De
8:5 Thou shalt also consider in thine
heart, that, as a man chasteneth his son, so the LORD thy God chasteneth thee.
God
chastises with the Word.
Ps
119:11 Thy word have I hid in mine
heart, that I might not sin against thee.
Jer
10:24 O LORD, correct me, but with
judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing.
1
Jn 15:2 Every branch in me that beareth
not fruit he taketh away (lifts up): and every branch that beareth fruit, he
purgeth it (cleanses), that it may bring forth more fruit.
3 Now ye are clean through the word which I
have spoken unto you.
4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch
cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye,
except ye abide in me.
5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that
abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me
ye can do nothing.
Corporal punishment may not always be required. Some times a "time out" will have the desired effect of correction. Regardless the punishment should fit the infraction, and always bring the child back to your loving arms as the Father does us.
Continuing
in Proverbs for an older child, those who have reached the age of
accountability (3rd to 8th grade):
These
kids are for the most part are past swats, and have learned to respect you and
your parenting. If you have not disciplined them when they were young, it is going
to be hard for you and them at this stage. They should know how to behave, and be
familiar with interactions with others, and an understanding of the 10
commandments, because you have introduced them to Jesus, and they are growing
spiritually and emotionally. Discipline at this stage should be restriction of privileges or grounding.
Pr
4:23 Keep thy heart with all diligence;
for out of it are the issues of life.
The
heart is where your innermost self resides and by this time should be
reflecting a born again spirit.
24 Put away from thee a froward mouth, and
perverse lips put far from thee.
Think
before you speak, your intent, your effect, then speak. If there is not good,
be quiet.
25 Let thine eyes look right on, and let thine
eyelids look straight before thee.
Follow
the paths of Jesus: Love, Justice, Compassion, and Peace, don’t lie, steal,
cheat, covet, etc.
26 Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy
ways be established.
In
following what the Word of God teaches.
27 Turn not to the right hand nor to the left:
remove thy foot from evil.
Follow the paths that God has outlined in His Word.
For
the young teen coming to adulthood, (High School):
These are no longer kids,
but young adults. They need to be learning advanced concepts of interpersonal
dynamics. They need to have a respect for others, for life, for you as parents,
and foremost for God. They need to be learning about the promises of God and
how they can receive them in their lives.
Show
them how to avoid the temptations of the world. Always have an open door and heart for them, to
guide and council them.
Pv3:
1 ¶ My son, forget not my law; but let thine
heart keep my commandments:
2 For length of days, and long life, and peace,
shall they add to thee.
3 Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind
them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
4 So shalt thou find favour and good
understanding in the sight of God and man.
5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and
lean not unto thine own understanding.
6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall
direct thy paths.
7
¶ Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear
the LORD, and depart from evil.
8 It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow
to thy bones.
9 Honour the LORD with thy substance, and with
the firstfruits of all thine increase:
10 So shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and
thy presses shall burst out with new wine.
Teach
your children to give and be generous and the very truth of the Tithe and all
it means. If you don’t trust God with your money and His promises about it, how
do you trust Him with anything? They need to learn to tithe and save, also to use money as a tool, and in its place.
11 My son, despise not the chastening of the
LORD; neither be weary of his correction:
12 For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even
as a father the son in whom he delighteth.
Tell
them, there may be times that is seems God does not respond. It is always you
that walks away, God is never changing. Sin always brings something bad. Rom 8
says that the wages of sin is death. We are forgiven by Jesus, yes, and we
should try to avoid things that will hurt us or others, but mainly our Father.
When you know you have missed it, ask God to forgive you and go on.
When
Noah was saved with his family on the Ark, they were saved. Whether or not he
fell down in the Ark, he was still in the Ark. So it is with us who are saved
and the Children of God. We are on the Ark of His Salvation in Jesus…nothing
can take us from that.
Teach
them to learn to listen to God.
Jn
10:27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know
them, and they follow me:
28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they
shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.
29
My Father, which gave them me, is
greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand.
30 I and my Father are one.
Teach
them to mind their words carefully.
Pr 15:4 A wholesome tongue is a tree of life: but
perverseness therein is a breach in the spirit.
Watch
what you say, what you confess. Teach your children to know the importance of their
words.
Ja
3: 2 For in many things we offend all. If any man
offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the
whole body.
3
Behold, we put bits in the horses’
mouths, that they may obey us; and we turn about their whole body.
4 Behold also the ships, which though they be
so great, and are driven of fierce winds, yet are they turned about with a very
small helm, whithersoever the governor listeth.
5 Even so the tongue is a little member, and
boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth!
6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of
iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body,
and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.
7 For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and
of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of
mankind:
8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an
unruly evil, full of deadly poison.
9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and
therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God.
10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and
cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.
Mk
11:22 And Jesus answering saith unto
them, Have faith in God.
23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever
shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea;
and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he
saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever
ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.
Explain
that the power of your words can work to the negative side; “my sickness”, “I always
catch a cold this time of year”, “I will never find a job”, these kind of statements
are not what you want to manifest in your life.
The
power of your words is like the faith of Abraham who followed the faith of God
and called things that are not as though they were. Rm 4:17
Ps
32:2 Blessed is the man unto whom the
LORD imputeth not iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no guile. (only
through God’s Grace)
Warn
your children that some religions try to teach the law rather than Grace, which
is the true gospel. Others try and mix law and Grace. This never works. If you think
that your life is blessed or cursed by God because of your actions, then the Grace
of Jesus has no effect.
Ga
5:4 Christ is become of no effect unto
you, whosoever of you are justified by the law; ye are fallen from grace.
Gal
3: 5 He therefore that ministereth to
you the Spirit, and worketh miracles among you, doeth he it by the works of the
law, or by the hearing of faith?
6
¶ Even as Abraham believed God, and it
was accounted to him for righteousness.
7 Know ye therefore that they which are of
faith, the same are the children of Abraham.
8 And the scripture, foreseeing that God would
justify the heathen through faith, preached before the gospel unto Abraham,
saying, In thee shall all nations be blessed.
9 So then they which be of faith are blessed
with faithful Abraham.
10 For as many as are of the works of the law
are under the curse: for it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not
in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them.
11 But that no man is justified by the law in
the sight of God, it is evident: for, The just shall live by faith.
12 And the law is not of faith: but, The man
that doeth them shall live in them.
13 Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the
law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that
hangeth on a tree:
14 That the blessing of Abraham might come on
the Gentiles through Jesus Christ; that we might receive the promise of the
Spirit through faith.
2Co
5:21 For he hath made him to be sin for
us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.
We
are not righteous for our works, but for His work.
Speak
God’s promises into your life to receive their manifestation as you believe and
trust God to be good to His Word. As your children grow they will see the effects
of your faith in life and will be prepared to continue with their faith for all
their lives.
Bible quotes from AKJV. Pictures from Inet. A Layman Looks at the Word is non-profit.
